Tips for Conversations that Create Impact

A perfect Saturday morning for me is drinking coffee, appreciating my view of the Atlantic, and listening to Hillbilly at Harvard from 9-1 EST. I love the music, the wacky lyrics and best of all -- the host Cousin Lynn. He just says whatever is there, whenever it’s there and it doesn’t seem to matter that he’s broadcasting across the World Wide Web (which he likes to say).
 
Cousin Lynn communicates in a way many people do.
 
He just talks. He’s on the radio so it is a monologue and not a dialogue. I call it “mind on broadcast”.
 
That’s great for a quaint radio show, but it doesn’t work well in communication.
 
If you’d like to increase your impact of your communication, consider these two important points before opening your mouth:

• What is your intent? Why are you saying what you’re saying? What is your commitment? And how will it benefit the other person (So put yourself in their shoes and think about why they’d be interested or engaged in what your intent is?)
• Then, as you communicate, pay attention to your impact. What is the person hearing? How are they hearing it? Check in every so often. Don’t talk for long periods without checking in because you have an intent and the other person has a filter of what they’re hearing. If you want to make an impact with your communication, you want to know what they’re hearing. That will help you course correct, understand them and adjust so you both understand each other better.

 
It seems so simple but you’d be surprised how little people do it. Especially when it’s going to be a difficult conversation. If it’s a challenging conversation, we often are uncomfortable and get the attention on ourselves, not focusing about the other person at all.
 
I find even consultants and coaches don’t have this skill down. I was at a consultants’ meeting a while back and consultants would broadcast their thoughts on the subject at hand, talk on and on, and seem to be unaware that people had stopped listening. I wondered if that works when they’re consulting with a client. This week I published my thoughts on raising the bar on the coaching industry on Medium.
 
If you want to increase your impact in your communication and your influence in your organization, let’s talk. You can schedule a complimentary session here.